Thoughts on Missing Out
Tis the season for wedding industry FAM Trips, best of lists, holiday gifts and holiday parties you are not going to be included in and invited to. So inevitably, tis the season for hurt feelings and missing out. It feels like a good time for this topic - Thoughts on Missing Out.
It's really easy to watch the stories of other planners and vendors on socials and feel behind, left out and over looked.
I find myself, even after all these years, having to remember and remind myself about who I am and what my goals are surrounding these.
FAM Events or Trips or marketing events hosted by venues, PR companies or travel companies can be super fun! But they do take you away from your desk, your clients and your real life. They often require travel (sometimes on your on dime) and you need to have a specific attire and are on a very specific schedule. So even if they are shiny and fun, they might not be the right fit for your business currently, your workload or your schedule. They can be a great opportunity to strengthen relationships and build new ones, but are unlikely to get you new or more business right away.
Our beloved wedding industry has a lot of awards and even more best of lists. The reality is, so many of them have to do with advertising dollars, popularity contests rather than recognition of those who are best at what they do. They can be fun and a great addition to your resume but let's try to to tie any of our self worth to these awards and lists. You are worthy even if you are not winning any awards or being named on any lists.
Holiday Gifting and Holiday Parties are a wonderful way for venues and vendors to say think you for planner and vendors support over the year. It’s a key part of their annual marketing and not everyone can be included.
If you are at all struggling with this, here are some of the steps I go through and maybe they can help you too.
First, we will never be invited and included in everything. That's a silly expectation so let's not do that to ourselves. There are SO many wedding planners and vendors and so many good ones. Venues have strategic reasons for those the include, they don't actually give much thought past that. These events are expensive for them so they are most often focused on those who bring them good business or those who they think will.
Second, are your goals this year recognition or more about your clients, your financials and your business growth? Not to say that some recognition may not help your goals. But what I can say is that recognition doesn't always mean more clients, higher profits or more business growth. Are your goals more about work life balance? Then maybe attending more things outside of work hours is not the right fit for you right now.
Third, rather than feeling left out, how can I take this opportunity to celebrate and encourage those around me? I get so much joy in cheering others on, that this is the best fix for any internal struggle I might be having. So let's congratulate the award and best of winners you think are great. Send flame emojis or love to the friends who got all dressed up for that event. Double tap and comment on the friends sharing their experiences and wins. Let's take the time to celebrate and spread the love. That will always serve you personally and professionally. I truly believe it.
Have SO MUCH fun if you get invited to something, get nominated or win an award, get invited to a party or receive a special gift!
Please don't at all think I don't want to encourage you, celebrate you and cheer you on. But with anything where there are winners or exclusive lists, there are many more planners hoping and wishing to be included.
So I am sending love to each and every one of you.
Xo, Heather